Roland Sawatzky's Purpose

I am a Playful Caring man, sharing of my time and abilities, allowing others to feel valued. - Roland Sawatzky

Ellen Feron's Purpose

I am a woman who loves herself.  Inspiring others to follow their passion.  - Ellen Feron

Brian Glenn's Purpose

I AM A COMMITTED MAN CARING FOR AND HELPING OTHERS ! - Brian Glenn

Debbie Harder's Purpose

I am a strong loving woman helping people feel unconditional love from the spirit within, empowering them to heal their hearts so they can live their lives filled with fun, passion, and dreams. - Debbie Harder

John Rempel's Purpose

I am a passionate man, helping others so that we can fly.  - John Rempel

Teresa Rempel's Purpose

I am a content woman, using her gifts to bring sunshine and joy. - Teresa Rempel

Loralee Martin's Purpose

I am an empowered woman inspiring others through love, laughter and SONG! - Loralee Martin

Pat Boardman's Purpose

I am a courageous and forgiving man helping others feel safe and accepted by loving them! Enjoy your journey! - Pat Boardman

Janet Janzer's Purpose

I am a FREE WOMAN. loving myself and others unconditionally so others will feel loved and worth. - Janet Janzer

Janette Daintrey's Purpose

I am an amazing woman, gently giving compassion,trust and love, I am a safe place for others. - Janette Daintrey

Dana Booth's Purpose

I am a strong confident woman showing others their value by loving and caring for them!!!! - Dana Booth

Judy Marten's Purpose

I am a sensitive woman nurturing others. - Judy Martens

Nastascia Antypowich's Purpose

My purpose is I am a strong confident woman showin others how to be a kid and have fun. - Nastascia Antypowich

Wade Mitchell's Purpose

I am a strong loving man SHOWING PEOPLE UNDERSTANDING LOVE AND RESPECT. - Wade Mitchell

Ernie Benesch's Purpose

I AM A MAN WHO LOVES HIMSELF AND WILLINGLY GIVES OF HIS SKILLS AND KNOWLEDGE TO OTHERS! - Ernie Benesch

Laurie Brandle's Purpose

I am a courageous woman inspiring others with my strength. - Laurie Brandle

I am a confident woman encouraging others to live their dreams ! - Shelly Wagoner

Light - Nelson Mandela

LIGHT

MY deepest fear is not that I am inadequate.
My deepest fear is that I am powerful beyond measure.

It is my light, not my darkness, that most frightens me.
I ask myself:
Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?
Actually, who am I not to be?

I am a child of God.

My playing small does not serve the world.
There's nothing enlightened about shrinking
so that other people won't feel insecure around Me.

I was born to make manifest the Glory of God
this is within me.
It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone.
And, as I let my own light shine,
I unconsciously give other people permission to the same.

As I am liberated from my fear, my presence automatically
liberates others.

paraphrased from Nelson Mandela

Brian Fowler's Purpose (Coach)

I am a STRONG AND CONFIDENT MAN INSPIRING OTHERS TO OPEN THEIR
HEARTS AND FIND VALUE IN ALL THINGS. - Brian Fowler

Faye Rodocker's Purpose

I LOVE ME AND BY BEING ME I GIVE PEACE AN LOVE TO ALL! - Faye Rodocker

Cheryl Schenk's Purpose

I am a trusting woman helping others to achieve their dreams. - Cheryl Schenk

Joel Wozney's Purpose

I am a committed and forgiving man educating others to lead by example. - Joel Wozney

Wally NIcholaichuk's Purpose (Coach)

I am a Loving Caring Passionate Man blessing others with quality time! -

Wally NIcholaichuk

Friends are Friends Forever

Friends are Friends Forever

Lyrics by Michael W. Smith

Packing up the dreams God planted

In the fertile soil of you

I can’t believe the hopes He’s granted

Means a chapter of your life is through

But we’ll keep you close as always

It won’t even seem you’ve gone

‘Cause our hearts in big and small ways

Will keep the love that keeps us strong

And friends are friends forever

If the Lord’s the Lord of them

And a friend will not say never

‘Cause the welcome will not end

Though it’s hard to let you go

In the Father’s hands we know

That a lifetime’s not too long

To live as friends

And with the faith and love God’s given

Springing from the hope we know

And we will pray the joy you live in

Is the strength that now you will show

We’ll keep you close as always

It won’t even seem you’ve gone

‘Cause our hearts in big and small ways

Will keep the love that keeps us strong

And friends are friends forever

If the Lord’s the Lord of them

And a friend will not say never

‘Cause the welcome will not end

Though it’s hard to let you go

In the Father’s hands we know

That a lifetime’s not too long

To live as friends

And friends are friends forever

If the Lord’s the Lord of them

And a friend will not say never

‘Cause the welcome will not end

Though it’s hard to let you go

In the Father’s hands we know

That a lifetime’s not too long

To live as friends

No a lifetime’s not to long

To live as friends

Though it’s hard to let you go

In the Father’s hands we know

That a lifetime’s not too long

To live as friends

No a lifetime’s note too long

To live as friends

Christina's Purpose

I am a woman who believes in her voice, while sharing hope and joy through the gifts God has given me.

WOOOHOO!!!!

Erica Sorensen's Purpose (Coach)

I am a beautiful confident woman inspiring others to live to their full potential! - Erica Sorensen

I Am An HONEST TRUSTWORTHY Man Showing Others LOVE And UNDERSTANDING ...... THANKS EVERYONE FOR AN AWSOME WEEKEND.....

Louise Gallagher's Purpose

I am a fearless woman sharing my unique gifts to create a world where spirits dance free in love, joy and harmony. - Louise Gallagher

David Slykhuis's Purpose

I am a worthy man; I bring joy to the world with my positive, fun-loving attitude !

I love myself as God loves me; I give of my heart so you can heal and be whole! - David Slykhuis

Rosemarie McGonigle's Purpose

I am a Precious woman, helping other hearts to heal, with honesty, gentleness, and trust. - Rosemarie McGonigle

Neil Steinwand's Purpose

I am good enough for me, glorifying God by inspiring others to use their gifts. - Neil Steinwand

Dallas Lazar's Purpose

I am a CONFIDENT man inspiring others to HAVE FUN!!!!!!!

Corrine Kerik's Purpose

I AM A FORGIVING WOMEN SHARING LAUGHTER AND JOY SO OTHERS CAN FIND PEACE AND SERENITY - Corrine Kerik

Courtney Jones' Purpose

I am a woman with PASSION, joyfully empowering others to feel valued and appreciated!

Richard Vanderzee's Purpose

I am a passionate, trustworthy man freeing others to release their inner child through laughter and play. - Richard Vanderzee

Randi Schoepp's Purpose

I am a confident woman who brings Freedom and Fun to others. - Randi Schoepp

Edgar Rodocker's Purpose

I am a dynamic man, mentoring by example!!

Daniel Cordova's Purpose

I am a strong confident man, inspiring others to discover their inner light and igniting their passions! - El Cordova

Debbie Leung's Purpose!

I am a Worthy Woman who LOVES Herself, Guiding others to Achieve their DREAMS - Debbie Leung

Brenda Duhaime's Purpose

I am a beautiful woman offering others comfort, love and hope. - Brenda Duhaime

Complete your homework

Please remember to have your homework for Givers II complete!! This time they check it!!

If you have lost the homework, scroll down on the blog to "Homework: Givers II", I have attached the homework as a PDF.

John Cleese and some "Deep Thoughts"

Click on the links to hear John Cleese's deep thoughts!

STARTING POINT (.46)
Philosophy has been the sparkplug for the lives of heroes

SCIENTIFIC LIFE (.42)
Should all our decisions be based on scientific facts?

DECISION (.40)
Decisions can be hard or easy, important or not. Should we always make them calmly? Is there no place for impulse or tradition?

Dog Breath = Have Fun

Alright on Saturday during the stretch there will be "dog breath", you know that "children's song", you may have heard of it, hey maybe you even got down with the children and 'went along' (good on ya!)

Now for those who didn't particpate you may have said to yourself the following "tapes":

- why? what's the point of this? It's for the "kids".
- It's a children's song, it's 'silly'

The point is to have 'fun' and sometimes being "silly" is the point.

When do you get the chance at work, or at home to be "silly; to have fun!?

Kids get it. Sad that as adults we forget this lesson.

If you haven't participated in "dog breath", when the song comes on, get down there and "you'll get the point".

T-Shirts, Noise Makers, Name Tags!

Don't forget the following for Givers II:

- T-Shirt (Bean is Believing)
- Noise makers, etc. (Your nearest Dollar Store will have party noise makers, let's make NOISE for the stretch on Saturday!!
- Your nametags!!

Everyone must call Andrea Matovich

Even if you fully paid for Choices, Givers I and Givers II, Andrea requires that you please call her ASAP to confirm you will be attending Givers II.

Phone #: 403-289-5019

Email: andrea@choicesseminars.com

If you've already called her - AWESOME!! You don't have to call her again to confirm.

Thanks!
Daniel

Creativity

Being creative. hmmm. Many of us wonder what it takes to become creative, some even doubt they "really" are creative.

Complete nonsense, we're all creative in different ways and a recent article in 'Scientific American: Mind' - Let your creativity soar (June/July 2008) demonstrates that our ability to become creative can be taught and be tracked.

According to one of the authors there are four core competencies of creative expression:
- People need to learn to preserve their new ideas (what he calls capturing)
- second to surround oneself with interesting people and 'things',
- tackle tough problems (challenge oneself),
- and expand their knowledge (broadening)

So, by 'capturing' they mean making your idea concrete be it by writing it down, sending yourself an email or even getting up and actually trying to do the idea in question. The important point is not to judge the idea itself. Next try tackling difficult problems, be it a crossword puzzle or a challenge at work, home, etc. Current research according the author that in tough situations multiple behaviors compete with each other and their interconnections create new behaviors and new ideas. Third, how do you manage your current social and physical surroundings? Fine at work one may not control the social millieu however you can change your physical environment (i.e. your desk). This is related to 'broadening', that is keeping your knowledge base diverse, the more interesting and diverse the things and the people surround you, the more interesting your own ideas become.

Homework!! Givers II

Yes, we have homework!!

In case you forgot or have lost your homework, I have attached the Givers II homework!

Click on the URL below:

http://sites.google.com/site/beanisbelieving/

Thanks!
Dan

Bean is Believing - Facebook

In case you missed Neil's past email, Neil created the Bean is Believing group in Facebook.

http://www.facebook.com/

If you're on Facebook & you were part of Choices in June, you may join!

Description:	A group for people who attended Choices Calgary in June, 2008 to keep in touch.

REBT and You

They say always write about what you know...one of my "hobbies" which I'm getting back into is 'public speaking'...one of the biggest fears which amazingly beats fear of death is the fear of public speaking!

Fear of public speaking affects people in many ways.

Some people I saw were so afraid of public speaking that it affected their lives; they didn't apply for better jobs because the position involved speaking to groups.

Others do get up and speak but their fear makes them less than effective communicators. The result is all too common - trembling, speaking too fast and too softly, memory vanishing making them appear disorganized or silly. Often speakers will then over-prepare or read from script making their talk less natural, less relaxed.

The method I was taught to gain confidence and relax was REBT (Rational Emotive Behavior Therapy), basically REBT looks at the fundamental cause of your speaking anxiety, essentially what you are saying to yourself.

Now common-sense would have you believe that in public speaking that the following self-talk is what you need to say, such as; "I've got to be entertaining. It would be horrible to be boring." or "I must come accross as credible." or "I must not make any mistakes."

Now many people are aware of this self-talk and resort to "positive thinking". They say something positive to themselves such as, "I am a entertaining speaker."

But there is a fundamental problem with this kind of reasoning.

Deep down in their hearts they may not believe this. Because if it were true, why try so hard to convince yourself otherwise.

REBT teaches you to recognize and then counter or dispute the beliefs that lead to the way you talk to yourself.

So, for example, if you're saying to yourself that you must not make any mistakes, REBT would have you look at that statement and see if it's supported by any evidence.

Now where I used to work there was an account manager who believed that she could not make any mistakes in front of clients. As a result she felt more pressured and actually made more mistakes that she was trying to avoid. When she spoke, she would get choked up, she would lose her memory, she even suffered from head-aches!!

When analyzing the truth of her statement, I discovered that many of our co-workers had made mistakes during their presentations in front of stakeholders, but that it didn't result in anyone getting fired or reprimanded. So here was evidence that COUNTERED her self-talk. The statement that she must not make any mistakes was clearly untrue.

As a result she came to the conclusion that she would like to give error free presentations but that it was silly and unhelpful to DEMAND that she make no mistakes.

When it came to her next presentation instead of trying to be simply positive and convince herself of something was untrue, ("I can speak without making mistakes."), she simply reminded herself that she didn't have to be perfect. She later told me that her nervousness went down significantly and that her presentation was not only well received but her manager even noticed the difference!

So, next time you get nervous giving a presentation, check what you are saying to yourself. Is there evidence to support it? If not, stop kidding yourself and making things more difficult.

I really believe REBT can not only help in public speaking but in different areas of our lives.

Random

Back in 2005 I was blessed to have been forwarded this...it was originally on Ebay.

Don't ever take yourself too seriously and when you're feeling blue find something in your life to get you out of it! I feel this will help.

http://www.banterist.com/archivefiles/000286.html

The Seven Cs of Success

I recently read an article, 'Running with the Seven Cs of Success' (Running & Philosophy, a marathon for the mind ed: Michael W. Austin), below are the seven Cs. (It's practically verbatim)

Condition 1: We need a clear conception of what We want, a Vivid Vision, a Goal clearly imagined

Let all your effort be directed toward some object, let it always keep some goal in view! (Seneca)

"The Quest for Success", Morris writes, "always begin with a target. We need something to aim at, something to shoot for." To be successful in any challenging, worthwhile endeavor, we need goals both to motivate and to guide us.

Condition 2: We need a Strong Confidence that We can achieve our Goal

Self-trust is the first secret of success. (Ralph Waldo Emerson)

"Our life" said the Roman emperor and philosopher Marcus Aurelius (AD 121 - 80), "is what our thoughts make it." This is a point on which philosophers, coaches and successful people in all walks of life agree: Winners believe in themselves. They are confident, enthusiastic, and consistently positive.

Condition 3: We Need a Focused Concentration on What it Takes to Reach that Goal

We should work hard with all the courage we can muster, ignoring any distractions, and struggle with a single purpose. (Seneca)

Meeting challenges, running goals requires dedication, planning, and sacrifice. Many start out like a ball of fire, but many fall victim to distraction, adversity or the "worries and riches of the pleasures of life" (Luke 8:14). To get from A to B to C and D, where D is some performance at the very top of our powers, requires an uncommon singleness of purpose. Those who succeed prioritize in ways that others may find difficult to understand.

Condition 4: We Need a Stubborn Consistency in Pursuing Our Vision, a Determined Persistence to Achieve Our Goal

He who would arrive at the appointed end must follow a single road and not wander through many ways (Seneca)

We all love to take credit for our successes while blaming external uncontrollable factors for our failures. It's never our fault; it's always _______(fill in the blank with the appropriate excuse). The truth is sometimes we are to blame for our lack of success. We yield to temptation, backslide, act inconsistently with our goals and values. We need to nurture tenacity.

Condition 5: We need an Emotional Commitment to the Importance of What we're doing

To Succeed at anything you need Passion. (George Sheehan)

"Nothing great was ever achieved without passion" said Ralph Waldo Emmerson, in life we need passion - a robust sense of the value of what we are doing - to energize us, to motivate us to overcome challenges and disappointments, to prod us to dig deeper, and to give us the courage to take risks. So how does one sustain enthusiasm and commitment over the long haul? There are two keys to keeping our emotional commitments. The first is imagination. The most passionate people use their imaginations well. They envision themselves in new compelling ways, or find some new way to express their challenge. The second key is to continually set new goals.

Condition 6: We need a good character to Guide us keep us on a proper course

Character is Destiny (Heraclitus 530 - 470 BC)

Is a good ethical character necessary for success? No. Sometimes the 'wicked do prosper'. Scoundrels do rise to positions of power, wealth and fame. Nevertheless there is a strong case to be made between goodness and success. Now being "good" may not get you worldly or material success but it may be necessary for "true success". The kind of success that is longterm, deeply satisfying and open to using the best of our potential. Those who cultivate a deep sense of self-discipline understand this and become attractive to others. I mean who wants to help a jerk? But lots of people will help someone who they perceive to be "real" and a genuinely good person. This is a very relevant real-world lesson. Rarely is anything of great value accomplished alone.

Condition 7: We Need a Capacity to Enjoy the Process along the Way

Life must be played as play. (Plato 427 - 347 BC)

Some kinds of goods, Plato reminds us are both desirable for their own sake and also desirable for as means to other ends. Happiness is such a good. Happiness is an intrinsic good, something we want for its own sake. But it's also an instrumental good, a means to another good. So for example, most runners don't run because they want to lose weight or get fit, they run because they enjoy it. It becomes a huge part of their life, of who they are. The result they enjoy a contentment from being absorbed in the process of running. The feeling of contentment illustrates a fundamental insight into happiness - "the hedonistic paradox". The paradox is this: Usually the happiest people are not those who make happiness their goal. Rather, the happiest people tend to be those who experience happiness as a by-product of other things they value and enjoy, such as loving relationships and engaging in rewarding work. Runners understand this paradox because they live it daily. They find happiness through sweat, sacrifice and struggle. To most non-runners this is a complete enigma. Cars pass a lonely runner on the road - muscles aching, lungs burning. Why would anyone want to do that? The runner in turn barely notices the car. For her, reality is this road, this feeling, this moment. Soon she will be back to her life of deadlines, piano practices and endless loads of laundry. But for the moment there is nothing but this road...for her, journey and destination have fused. Success is now.

3 Questions, Givers and You

Some of you might remember that I studied philosophy!! And within philosophy there are only three questions of any relevance:

1. What is Real?

How you answer this, says a lot about where you're at. So answer it. What do you believe is fundamentally "real". Is it money? (hard to think how anything works without it), when I started I was a young upstart sophisticate who thought it was "power". All answers relating to this question come under the banner of "Metaphysics" or 'what is real'. (Answer according to me now in 2008: something to do with experiencing "love")

2. How do you know what is "real", is really "real"?

This goes by the uppity name of "epistemology" (theory of knowledge). So now it's time to defend your answer to question # 1. If you believe it's money, power or even love, what's your argument? What evidence do you provide?

3. Just because what is "real" is so, does it have to be?

Yes, professional philosophers have yet to come up with a funky title to question number three...it goes by "value theory". Think, art, politics, values. So if you're still confident in your answer to #1 and #2, does it have to be that way? Why can't it be another way?

This is the holy trinity of questions in philosophy, it can be argued that absolutely no progress has been made in over 3000 years and yet it's not the "answers" that keep this profession alive it's the questions. It's the answers to the "why" questions that keep hope alive.

This weekend ask yourself those difficult questions, dig deep and demand from yourself the "why" during Givers...you will be surprised.

Down by the River by Alison Krauss

Alright, don't know what "spirituality" means to me, but I did find this to be inspiring...she harmonizes so well...and the images are "nice". Take from it what you want. Goal is not to "convert" but it is to get you to think about your spirituality. What do you believe?

Don't forget your nametag!

For those attending Givers 1, please do not forget to bring your name tag! This tag will not only be used so that participants can address each other by first name, it will also be used to stick the "colors" onto the tag.

Kevin Eldson's Update from his small group

I had to share this...thank you Neil for forwarding Kevin's email and thank you Kevin for sharing...it made my day!

Hey Neil

Just wanted to let you know that everything is going great. I have been in
contact with our group on a weekly basis and they are all doing well. My
buddy Dave has been able to find his daughter which is really cool he said
he hopes to see her sometime this summer and he has found a new place.
When I got home from choices Laurie and I had a really good talk and we
have decided to go ahead with our wedding next summer which is great I
have been able to put the old demons behind me. We have been spending all
of our time together outside which we both enjoy. We did go out dancing
the other night and had a blast and we have also been spending more time
with our families. The day after coming home we did sign Laurie up for the
next seminar and just went to the info meeting last night, it was great to
see some of the people that were at choices again.
The tools are coming in wonderfully there have been no conflicts at work
now rather than reacting I talk to my coworkers and we solve the problem
which works much better.
Home life is much better we talk a lot more and Laurie is looking forward
to her time at choices , with a little nerves with not knowing what to
expect. I can't wait to be there for her on the weekend of her seminar.
All in all life is going the way I have been hoping for . Hope this note
finds things going well for you as well.

See you again soon
Kevin Elsdon

Choices Events

Don't forget the following events!

• Choices Golf Tournament, Sunday 20 July @ 1:00pm, to register please contact Bill Spangler or Andrea Matovich for details. Remember they also need volunteers!
• Super Choices, October 20 - 26, 2008 at Quaaout Resort & Conference Centre, Chase BC. To register please email vancouver@choicesseminars.com
• Super Givers, October 24 - 26 at Quaaout Resort & Conference Centre, Chas B.C. To register and info. please email calgary@choicesseminars.com

Homework!!

As Neil reminded us all, please commit to the following homework this week, forward your responses to your coaches.

• How is my buddy...
• Status of the small group and what you have committed to the group
• Most exciting change in my life since seminar
• People I've shared the training with and people I've asked to attend Choices
• People already enrolled in Choices

Lastly, please send out the cards to three cards to someone different each week!!

T-Shirts and You

As you attend Givers 1 get ready for the mother of all T-shirts!

Bean is Believing!

Cost: $25.00

Please have cash ready!

Please forward your t-shirt size again to Ellen Feron by Friday 11 July, she may be reached

Big hugs to the following for all their help on getting these fabulous shirts made:

Ellen Feron, Jan Barker, Janette Daintrey, Laurie Brandle, Nola Stein, and Kerry Anne Stewart.

First Week and Me

The first week has passed and we're back into our lives; family, work, long weekends, holidays and this wonderful gift (Choices) now in our lives. Let me share my "Choices" experience with you...on Monday 23 June, first day back at work I had to let go one of the staff. It was an odd feeling to say the least, inside I was buzzing with "Choices" and yet I had to do one of the most difficult tasks - let a staff member go. I knew that in our small office this would not go over well, this individual was very well liked, in fact they loved him. When I informed the staff in a quick staff meeting of the dismissal one staff member "lost it". Below are some of the comments she mentioned:

• You don't respect me
• Who is going to do all the work now
• This (expletive, expletive) sucks
• I'm going to quit
  

Wow! Tell me how you feel! I had a 'choice', my mind went quickly to the tools I learned in "Choices", I quickly and skillfully used my "Kung-Fu Choices" skills. Let's just say that by the end of our 'conversation', I had her reassessing her position (by having her look at the situation through different glasses) and acknowledging the self-defeating games being played and I even managed to make her laugh (she later thanked me for that!).

Choices works.

Use the tools, talk to your small group, your coaches, they are the best resources!!

El Cordova

Things To Do This Week!!

Alright, this week you must commit to the following:

- Call your small group leader
- Write or Email three participants
- Call your buddy
- Small Group Leaders, please contact Neil or myself with updates from your small group

Why? Why is this important?

Keep the flame of hope, passion and love alive. You and you alone know what keeps you back and what the power of a kind supportive word from a new friend can mean. It's that inside knowledge you received from your small group that is 'key' or it can be the letter/email you send that makes someones day, into a fabulous day. Do not give into those "tapes" i.e. I don't have time...I'm stampeding (for those in Calgary this week). Ok the Stampeding reference is silly, but so are our 'tapes'. Remember life is not a dress rehearsal you only get one shot!

Dan